Last month, the greatest live music troll in history was pulled off in the small town of Dayton, Ohio USA. On 4/20, no less, hundreds of Limp Bizkit fans rocked up to a petrol station expecting a spur-of-the-moment performance (yes, a petrol station), only to learn that some dickhead legend had set the entire thing up as a prank.
Hundreds. There were hordes of fans that legitimately believed Limp Bizkit was going to play a petrol station on Stoner Day.
The situation is absolutely magical – not only because there were literally hundreds of people that fell for it, but it’s also spurred one of the most pointless (but also hilarious) memes we’ve seen in a fair while. Now, dozens of Facebook events are popping up for such monumental events as “GWAR at CiCi’s Pizza” and “Hoobastank at the dump”.
Because it’s Monday arvo and we can’t be fucked doing anything legitimately professional, us here at BLUNT HQ have trawled the inner depths of Facebook to bring you the five best* gigs you probably won’t mind missing out on…
SMASH MOUTH Live! At Planned Parenthood
The vital details
Smash Mouth performing all their hits, including “Walkin’ On The Sun”#partytime
**SPECIAL GUESTS JUST ANNOUNCED**
– Len
– Master P & Silkk the Shocker feat. C-Murda (live via satellite from The Louisiana State Penitentiary)
– Chris Gaines
– Eagle Eye Cherry
VIP ONLY meet & greet held in the Casa La Chapala parking lot.
Pledge your attendance: http://bit.ly/1SXXRBc
Biz Markie performs LIVE at McDonald’s Playplace
The vital details
McDonald’s has what u need and so does Biz
Come thru it’ll be lit
BRING YOUR OWN SAUCES THIS IS MCNUGGET ANARCHY
Pledge your attendance: http://bit.ly/1NnVg3t
Rage Against The Machine LIVE at Travis County Jail
The vital details
In a super special LIVE performance, RATM will be playing their eponymous album, track by track, for a live audience!
This is a limited engagement, and will be filling up quickly! You are advised to practice civil disobedience by protesting, drinking alcohol and smoking cannabis. Police will not interfere!
RSVP soon and share with all your friends!
Pledge your attendance: http://bit.ly/1WUHzdT
Dane Cook and Staind with special guests Seether and Trapt LIVE at the Fireworks Tent in the Kmart Parking Lot in Wilmington, North Carolina
The vital details
Show starts at 2:30 sharp in front of the Fireworks Tent in the Kmart parking lot between the Burger King and Chilis on College Rd.
RECEIVE FIVE FREE TICKETS IF YOU SPEND $50 AT KMART OR THE FIREWORKS TENT
Roman candles and Bud Lite 1/2 off with valid college or military ID
Pledge your attendance: http://bit.ly/1WinfE4
Taco Bell Presents Criss Angel MINDFREAK feat Papa Roach & Drowning Pool & Sasha Grey (solo set) & HIM hosted by Katt Williams & Guy Fieri
The vital details
Free
All ages
Experience the real life miracles by icon Criss Angel in the flesh!
FREE QUESALUPAS TO THE FIRST TWO HUNDRED GUESTS!
Opening acts Papa Roach and Drowning Pool guaranteed to keep the bodies hitting the floor and cutting lives into pieces before the magic happens!
A&E will be filming a special so be sure to sign their waiver so your face doesn’t get blurred out!
Pledge your attendance: http://bit.ly/1rvK1Ml
Metallica with Sum 41 at Sonic Drive In off Oltorf
The vital details
Watch Metallica open up for Sum 41 in an epic performance at the Sonic Drive In off Oltorf and 35!
Let the tunes soothe your ears while Lars delivers you bourbon brown sugar creamery shakes and magenta smoothies.
VIP and Platinum wristbands are still available. However, camping packages are sold out. VIP includes skates and one chocolate frosty.
Pledge your attendance: http://bit.ly/23Dspd6
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