In the lead-up to triple j’s Hottest 100 of Australian Songs this weekend, the Blunt Mag team are counting down their personal top ten – here’s Video Editor Mathew Dyason’s top picks, from The Wiggles to Cold Chisel.
Despite my music taste becoming increasingly out-of-touch with each passing year, I do still enjoy the Hottest 100. Ranking songs into an arbitrarily ordered list might be dumb and pointless, but I am also dumb and pointless, and so I love making lists.
So here’s my personal top 10 Australian songs ever. I promise it will be an entirely uncontroversial list.
10. The Wiggles – Rock-A-Bye Your Bear
There is an art to writing music for children which doesn’t belittle kids or get on their parents’ nerves, and Rock-A-Bye Your Bear is a masterclass in it. While Fruit Salad and Hot Potato might be bigger Wiggly favourites, they don’t quite share in the same timelessness as Rock-A-Bye.
9. Gang of Youths – What Can I Do If The Fire Goes Out?
I have a rule that a song less than 10 years old cannot be called a classic. It’s been only 8 years since Gang of Youths dropped the urgent What Can I Do If The Fire Goes Out?, but in this case I am willing to make an exception.
After all, is that not what the song is all about? Giving in to an ardent, overwhelming passion and living for the moment?
I don’t know if Australia will still be listening to Gang of Youths in 50 years’ time, but for me, right now, What Can I Do If The Fire Goes Out? feels like one of our county’s greatest musical achievements. So it’s going on the list.
8. The Whitlams – No Aphrodisiac
In my mind, there’s no song like No Aphrodisiac. Ever since childhood I’ve harboured a strange fascination with the song: from its moody atmosphere and conflicting emotions, to the suspicious way grown-ups would awkwardly fumble their way out of having to explain what an “aphrodisiac” is to me.
It’s hard to believe a song as strange as No Aphrodisiac was such a hit, but it really is that compelling of a tune. That, and the 90’s were just weird.
7. The Presets – My People
Nightclubbing wasn’t exactly my scene in 2008, but as an 18 year old Gold Coaster, visiting those debaucherous dens was inevitable. In these dark times, the single solace I clung to was the guarantee of hearing My People played extremely loud.
I don’t think I—or any other dancefloor dwellers at the time—realised that the refrain of “I’m here with all of my people / locked up with all of my people” was not about the intoxicating abandon of sleepless nights dancing with strangers in the grimy corners of Orchid Avenue, but rather a protest of Australia’s inhumane detainment of asylum seekers in off-shore detention centers. In hindsight, with lines such as “Soldiers on the waterfront / they want to ship me far away”, The Presets weren’t exactly being coy about it.
6. Kylie Minogue – Love At First Sight
An extraordinary coincidence in my life is that I grew up during the single most interesting period of human history: Y2K. It was an era of enormous technological advancements which actually made us excited about the future—contrary to our current, terrifying one.
As a Y2K scholar, I can confidently say there is no better ambassador of millennial futurism than Fever-era Kylie. Love At First Sight is a joyful, optimistic nu-disco tune, perfect for welcoming new relationships and new millennia alike.
5. The Church – Under The Milky Way
Sometimes a song’s vibe is so gosh darn good, it’s all you need to be a certified all-timer. I’d say that is the case with Under The Milky Way, but that would undermine the pristine songcraft on display.
I think The Church recognised how unfair it is for one song to be immaculate in both vibes and songwriting, and so attempted to even the balance by including a bagpipe solo. Unfortunately, that bagpipe solo also rips and only adds to the sublime wonder of Under The Milky Way.
4. Flight Facilities – Clair De Lune (feat. Christine Hoberg)
Clair De Lune may interpolate part of Debussy’s masterwork of the same name, but it has much more in common with its impeccable vibe than any melodic reference. In making the connection, Flight Facilities pulled their brand of dreamlike ambient electronica into the canon of impressionist art history.
Not even Telstra could make me hate this song, despite their best attempts.
3. Crowded House – Better Be Home Soon
Let’s clear this up once and for all: Crowded House are an Aussie band, Split Enz are a kiwi band. That’s the rule.
Better Be Home Soon is too perfect of a song to be passed over due to semantics, but it’s also a personal one for me. It was the first song I heard after learning a friend had lost their battle to cancer. I still cannot hear the opening lines of “Somewhere deep inside / Something’s got a hold of you.” without thinking of him.
2. Divinyls – I Touch Myself
Is there any other nation on Earth who can claim that one of their all-time greatest songs is about pleasuring yourself? Australia might be the only one, and we need to be making a bigger deal of it.
I Touch Myself is as catchy as it is fearless and confident. Not only in its touchy subject matter, but also in Chrissy Amphlett’s iconic, provocative performance.
1. Cold Chisel – Khe Sanh
I cannot tell you how much I hated Khe Sanh growing up. The moment I turned 30, everything changed.
Like Gregor Samsa, I awoke one morning from uneasy dreams to find myself transformed into a true-blue Aussie who friggin’ loved Khe Sanh. Barnsey comes for us all eventually.
Check out the rest of the Blunt Mag team’s top ten Aussie song picks here:
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